To my angel baby on his 1st birthday,
As you lay next to me sleeping, my heart is filled with so many emotions. God knew you were going to be my son before I was ever a mother. When I was a little girl I never saw myself as a mother, more over a mother of five. When I met your father, neither one of us saw beyond the next couple of weeks nor were you in any plan we had. God had a different plan.
Your father had a way of making me smile from the inside out and from ear to ear. When he looked at me it was if the world stood still. He was one of my best friends in the world and I cherished our relationship. As some things do, it ended but before it did you came into my life. At first I could not figure out for the life of me why at that time you appeared, but I knew God had his reason. This past year has not been easy. I have cryed more tears, prayed more faithfully and have given over to God all my fears, with great faith knowing that through him all things broken can be restored. We have made it through your fight with the left CDH,PPHN, multiple infections, oxygen dependency, narcotic withdrawls, feeding problems and the hardest for mommy not having my friend to lean on through it all. You showed me that all I needed to lean on was God. He guided us through the storm to the calm waters. There is not a day that will ever go by that I will forget what a special gift God has giving me in you. From father to son, you are now the reason I smile from the inside out. I wouldn't change a step on our journey so far. Every inch , every yard, every mile has been a great learning and loving experience. The second lesson I learned was forgiveness. In the begining when you were going through all your ups and downs I said I would never forgive your father for not being there and I prayed about it and that changed. God spoke to me saying his love for us was unconditional and he has forgiven us of all sins, why would I deny your father of forgiveness, if I ever truely loved him. From that moment on my heart didn't hurt anymore. I forgave him of everything and prayed for him to come around. So just know it's promised to you that he will come around. Well papito thank you for the lessons taught through you so far and mommy looks forward to the many years to come. I LOVE YOU Bugsy! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
